LakbayPinay

Connected

2012-01-31T15:05:00.003+08:00

wow, was ecstatic to finally link with friends again after a while. it's been some time since i opened the net and was so glad to read mails/messages from friends. iba talaga ang nagagawa ng push galing sa mga kaibigan. :-)

have to get my life on track. let's see- have to:

-update my resume

-draft some applications

-polish on those technical what's-and-how's for interviews (just in case)

-trim down to size ehem

-practice driving

-stick to my daily discipline

phewwww! like i've said before, i'm back to square one and joining the rat-race once again.

huh, good luck to me!

New Year, New Hope

2012-01-08T11:31:00.010+08:00

it's the feast of the epiphany.

i can only offer a prayer of hope for my kababayans. Monsignor's homily hit me hard. and here i am feeling all hopeless and sad for the plight of so many here back home.

have been too distressed over what happened just weeks ago. 'twas the saddest Christmas ever in our community. i had long wanted to write about it but words just won't come. my heart was too crushed over the sorry sights in our place everywhere.

many relatives were still reeling from the floods. some sustained wounds from banging/crushing their feet trying to get out of the ceiling with the muddy waters rising a foot a minute inside their homes. their doors could not be opened due to the pressure of the raging waters outside hence they were trapped inside. a lot of the friends and neighbors we know perished this way- trapped inside their houses! an aunt died, her mother still missing until now; my mom's friend was washed up on the river but alas 5 grandchildren died,with her husband and 1 more granddaughter still missing. theirs were the grief-stricken faces that have been posted and re-posted on facebook countless times.- that of a father carrying his child, and his two sisters on the background wailing for their own dead children alongside him. some more aunts and uncles fought their way to get out of their homes (breaking glass doors/ crushing the ceiling with their hands and feet) and staying on the rooftop until the early morning hours when daybreak came and the waters have receded to waist-deep height. my own brother barely managed to help his friend's family get out of Orchids village before the waters inundated their home along with Bayug island just a few meters across it.

my kuya's family and i arrived days after what happened. but the gloom and sadness was so foreboding, it was heart-wrenching. my relatives took up camp along the roadside near their homes along with many others in the neighborhood. not many went to the camps/relocation areas. not when they have friends and relatives willing to help them recover. and yes, they never received any of the donations that were supposed to have come. the local government will not give to those not staying in the camps/relocation sites. what stupidity! these people who saw fit not to join the already over-crowded centers still deserve to receive their share. a lot of mattresses were donated but these were not given to those not in the camps. wtf?!! the people who did not go there still needed those beds, still needed food, still needed clothing. and because of that, these people have their spirits even more crushed. because a lot of them did not get the proper help from their own local government. the mayor's wife often get shouted at and rejected out of the affected areas as stories started spreading about how she would act high and mighty demanding private donations by civil groups to be centralized in the city centers.

after days of meeting with the city council on the needs of the people in the affected areas and getting frustrated over the inaction and mere lipservice, our parish priest started encouraging those who were willing to help to just go directly to the areas and do their outreach. and all the better. otherwise, the people would have waited in vain. they needed help immediately, and they did not get it. how can local government not release funds at such a crucial time as this? a calamity fund has been accorded to the city but all over the place you can hear people complaining and asking where it was. city officials, have you really been looking after your people's plight? why then is it easier for you to release funds during campaign period than during a calamity when your constituents gravely needed it?

this has been cleaned by Christmas time but alas, so few came for the Eucharistic celebration. on the early morning of Dec 25th, we went to church early but what we were told to be 6am mass became a 7am mass. what usually is teeming with chattering and joyful faces of old folks and children alike on any given Sunday was then the saddest face of Christmass i've ever seen. yes, too few came. i was doing the first reading and as i read the verses assigned to me, i felt saddened by the gloomy faces before me.

below are pics near the bridge. houses have been swept away. look at the debris and giant logs that lodged anywhere thereafter.

here are pics of Orchids Village just a few hundred meters from our place.

hills of mud like this were bulldozed from the roads in Orchid village so that it can be passable once again.

across Orchids is Bayug island, or what's left of it.

on this sight was once a hanging bridge leading to Bayug island. now it has been swept away by the waters. those who want to go the main island now rides on a small banca or raft like this.

Saddened by Sendong

2011-12-18T23:18:00.004+08:00

not too happy since yesterday. am feeling distressed with news about Sendong.

Prayer for Those Who Suffer

For those who suffer,

and those who cry this night,

give them repose, Lord;

a pause in their burdens

Let there be minutes

where they experience peace,

not of man but of angels.

Love them, Lord, when others cannot.

Hold them, Lord, when we fail with human arms.

Heal their prayers

and give them the ability to hear you back

in whatever language they best understand.

Amen.

2nd Sunday of Advent

2011-12-04T12:52:00.006+08:00

woke up to a rainy Sunday morning. took a bath and went to hear mass at the clubhouse. it's already the second Sunday of Advent. and still in consonance with the Advent readings, today's sermon is about our personal preparation for the Lord's coming- filling in of the uneven roads in our life (making up for what we lack / omissions), making straight the path (giving up vices, admitting our wrongs), levelling the mountains into plains (humbling ourselves, putting out our pride), basically stop sinning or trying our level best not to commit to sin anymore. Father was reminding us about the coming Simbang Gabi and how the clusters are gonna be handling the mass sponsorship.

stopped by the grocery and bought tinapay and cookies. just got back home and cooked breakfast. had a hearty meal of daing, corned beef and scrambled eggs. ang sarap kumain pag umuulan. and the daing smelled of dried pusit. this came from indonesia, one of their delicacies. sarap, ang lutong!

November's Here

2011-11-15T10:37:00.006+08:00

kuya had his bday at home last week. he just turned 40. and that's when life begins....

and mommy will be celebrating her birthday in a couple of days. may God bless you both and may He continue to love you and hold you in His warm loving embrace. love you both!

In Retrospect

2011-10-18T11:41:00.004+08:00

time flies by so fast

little did i know, christmas is just round the corner and the year is soon to end. what's in store for me next year? i wonder...

Bagyong Pepeng is here

2011-09-27T11:04:00.002+08:00

i woke up and it's dark. my niece told me there's brownout.

Mister God's Face

2011-09-22T12:27:00.004+08:00

Happy birthday Lolo Francis and Francis Thomas, wherever you both may be!

Mister God, once again I call on you to guide me in this life. I remember my blogs 5 years ago about lolo and Tom-Tom. Here's another excerpt from the book Mister God, This is Anna.

" One day Anna and Fynn attended mass. In the homily Fr. Castle, the pastor, spoke a lot about God. Anna noticed that he spoke a lot about "knowing" God and "seeing" God. And the pastor said that one day we would see God face to face. Anna paid close attention to what the pastor was saying but Fynn noticed that the little girl did not agree.

Suddenly Anna grabbed Fynn by the hand and whispered to him, though loud enough that those nearby could hear: "What will the pastor do when it comes out that God has no face, not even eyes? How then will people see God face to face?" Then she moved even closer and added:

"I'll tell you, Fynn, that Mister God has no face. He sees all of us on earth, every single one. But to do that, He does not have to turn around at all or even squint. See, Fynn, you and I have a front and a back. If I want to see something behind me, I've got to turn around because I don't have any eyes on back. But God only has a front and no back. He can look everywhere without turning."

How I wish I can look at life and understand and accept its mysteries in the simplicity that this little girl can. I just maybe have to start looking up to God without thought of His physical appearance, much less His face-lessness. I have to strengthen my faithfulness.

Need to Heal

2011-08-26T13:45:00.007+08:00

Have you heard the story about a big truck getting stuck under a low overhead bridge? Nobody knows what to do until the town fool suggests that they let the air out of the tyres. This done, the truck which is now a couple inches lower, grazes through. See what a little bit of deflation can do? This teaches us a lesson on humility. And we can never be too high or too mighty for the Lord.

Prayer for Inner Healing

Speak clearly, Lord, into my heart.

In the past, I had been busy with life

and I forgot what it meant to really live.

In the midst of my pains and difficulties,

allow me to know you

so that I may understand

what living for you is all about.

I am weak, Lord, and helpless without you.

I surrender to you, Lord,

all my fears and my burdens.

I will focus on your truth

that you will be with me always.

I will never understand your ways

but I know that you have

a purpose for me.

Lord, as I continue this prayer,

gently touch me with your healing hands.

You are the Divine Healer

and the greatest physician of all.

I believe in my heart

that nothing is impossible to you.

Heal my innermost being,

my spirit and my soul.

I know, Lord, that there is an end

to my loneliness and sickness

because you died on the cross

and rose from the dead.

From now on I just want to live

with a loving heart

and not with a grumbling heart,

from now on, Lord,

I just want to live with a faithful heart

and not with a fearful heart.

In the mighty name of Jesus.

Amen.

Loving Koreanovela

2011-08-17T14:43:00.003+08:00

Lazy Wednesday

2011-08-10T13:28:00.004+08:00

i sure am feeling lazy today. but have promised myself to do the laundry. have finished the quilt cover and now spinning the tees and blouses while listening to Cruisin' 4 tracks. wooh, brings me back to yesterday.

Ang Babae

2011-08-04T18:36:00.007+08:00

Ito ay hango sa isang sulatin sa Storyteller's Minute. Nakuha nito ang aking atensyon habang ako'y naghahanap ng mababasa kanina. Hindi ko tiyak kung kelan ito isinulat kung kaya't ako'y nag-iisip kung 'Totoo pa rin kaya ito magpasahanggang ngayon?'

Flower Bud Moment

2011-07-27T06:43:00.006+08:00

was watching one heavy drama this summer (Knovela addictus ako nitong huli) and this poem flashed in the credits. just wanna quote it here as it seemed to echo one post i made some years back (credits to the author below)...

EVERY MOMENT IS A FLOWER BUD
by Jung Hyun Jong

I sometimes do regret
that occasion at the time,
could have been treasured.

That person at the time,
that thing at the time,
could have been a jewel.

I should have been more deeply entrenched,
I should have spoken more,
I should have listened more intently,
I should have loved more passionately.

Like a mute,
Like a deaf person,
Did I let it pass
like an absent-minded person?

I should have loved that moment
more ardently
A moment is everything.

Like a flower bud,
A flower bud that blossoms
as much as my ardor.
Like a flower bud.

Feeling Nostalgic

2011-07-26T14:50:00.003+08:00

suddenly nostalgia struck me.

attended a get-together with lb pips at the 70's Bistro last sat. saw some celebs as well. pero bakit ganun? feeling sad ako....

Rainy Day Tuesday

2011-07-26T13:44:00.002+08:00

Back to Square One

2011-07-21T00:44:00.003+08:00

well, that's how it's gonna be really....

Oratio Imperata

2011-03-31T01:43:00.015+08:00

just blog-hopped and started dreaming of summer back home, beaches and swimming frenzy...

but alas, my heart is troubled. eversince the tsunami that hit Japan, I could not stay still. i keep fearing of a time when a calamity will hit my country, especially where my family is, and I am not there with them. it is so hard to be away from our loved ones and even small news of bad things happening to people we know, or not know at all, is enough to keep us teetering on our toes fearful that the next one to meet such ill fate may be a loved one.

makes me long for home all the more.

may I offer the following prayer, lifted from my prayer book, Straight from the Heart,

The Oratio Imperata: A Prayer in Times of Calamities, Deluge and Pestilence.

Almighty Father,

we raise our hearts to you

in gratitude for the wonders of creation

of which we are part,

for your providence

in sustaining us in our needs,

and for your wisdom

that guides the course of the universe.

We acknowledge our sins

against you and the rest of creation.

We have not been good stewards of Nature.

We have confused your command

to subdue the earth.

The environment is made to suffer

by our wrongdoing,

and now we reap the harvest

of our abuse and indifference.

Global warming is upon us.

Typhoons, floods, volcanic eruption,

and other natural calamities occur

in increasing the number and intensity.

We turn to you, our loving Father,

and beg forgiveness for our sins.

We ask that we, our loved ones

and our hard earned possessions

be spared from the threat of calamities,

natural and man-made.

We beseech you to inspire us all

to grow into responsible stewards

of your creation, and generous neighbors

to those in need.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

March-ing Out

2011-03-31T00:36:00.003+08:00

The month is Marching out already. Sandstorms are signs that the weather's a-changing. Kuwait is pretty much hit by serious sandstorms these past few days. But not here in Dubai. It's getting cold at sundown. And that's another of the tell-tale signs for changing weather. Soon the air is going to be hot at any time of day.

This is one of those times when i start dreaming of our Philippine beaches. Hooo...

Off Again

2011-02-10T03:33:00.004+08:00

again, wandering the streets of rigga on my day off.

.. and eating at KFC.

.. and stealing glances on that DJ bag.

.. and paying my phone and internet bills.

.. and calling home.

.. and doing the laundry.

.. and watching news from back home.

.. and waiting for Imortal on primetime tv.

.. and then logging on to post on my blogsite.

this is the life of an OFW.

So Grateful

2011-01-30T21:35:00.003+08:00

many thanks to my mom and dad for everything! you're God's gift to me. and to the rest of my family (kuya, chi, nicole and esmuky), too. you're my lifeline. love you all!

Thank You

Resisting Temptation

2011-01-29T05:37:00.008+08:00

the D Shopping Fest has started last 2oth Jan and will be on till the 20th of Feb. So many SALEs happening everywhere... problema ko nga lang walang pang-shopping. wehehe...

kaya pasyal pasyal na lang ang drama ng lola niyo. naglalakad ako lagi sa gabi dito sa aming street kung saan ang happening every year. parade every night, fireworks pagdating ng 8:30 sa gabi, tapos rides galore. nagmistulang isang peryahan ang whole stretch ng rigga road. as usual, nauuwi sa bargain hunt ang lakad ko. di naman bawal tumingin-tingin e, at sabay pisil-pisil na rin, kilatis-kilatis kunyari bibili.

haaay. i'm trying to save kasi. pero hanggang try lang yata talaga ako. waaa! o tukso, layuan mo ako!

let's see. if there's a will, there's a way.

kailangan ko ng mas matibay at mas solid na visualization!!! naman!! begin with the end in mind, abigail!

Stormy Weather

2011-01-29T05:05:00.006+08:00

it was very dark when i went down from my flat to go to work. immediately i flagged the first cab i spotted just as it was rounding the curb towards our building. i thought i should hurry before it rains. it looked like it's gonna be heavy.

just three blocks from my place, however, i noticed it was not rain that came. the wind was picking up. and i mean picking up, like all sorts of things that can go along with it... scraps of paper, cardboard boxes, plastics, and sand- lots and lots of sand. a sandstorm was brewing and i didn't even recognize it for what it was. hardly had i seen it face-on. always i've watched sandstorms from afar. but this time, i was on it. i was so afraid. man! suddenly, the whole surrounding turned dark. i felt like i was inside a tornado. but this was dry and all sand.

the taxi driver's head was moving left and right every so often. i realized then that i was not the only one scared to be on the streets at that time. we could hear the howling of the wind and when we got near the workplace, we had to stop for the signal to go green, and the big sheet streamer at the tunnel was banging against the wall. it was just scary.

when i got off, me and just about everyone were scurrying to get inside the buildings. trees were falling on the cars at the parking areas. whew! it was really dangerous being out.

it was the first time in my life that i experienced that. i was so scared.

NEVER SAW BLUE LIKE THAT - SHAWN COLVIN

2011-01-14T17:09:00.000+08:00

i was at a F21 shop here in deira city center when this song suddenly played on air.

and suddenly i was back to my college days. watching julia roberts' movies. runaway bride. etc...

An OFW's Prayer

2011-01-14T17:03:00.013+08:00

Feeling melancholic but once again, let me post here a prayer lifted from the prayer book that my mom gave me. It's from Straight from the Heart, a St. Paul's publication.

Dear Lord,

source of hope and our salvation,

guide me as I travel,

lead me on the right path,

and never let me depart from you.

Grant me a safe journey from the home

I leave behind to my destination:

may I find true friends as well as

a decent and rewarding job;

may I enjoy the beauty of the place;

may I appreciate the grandeur

of your creation.

Watch over me

and lead me safely back home:

keep me away from harm and danger;

spare me from embarassment and humiliation;

deliver me from scandal and shame.

Stay by my side

and always remind me of my true home:

as a pilgrim, I am just passing by in this world;

as your creature, I must return to you;

as your servant, I must lead others to heaven.

Watch over those whom I leave behind.

Protect my family and loved ones

while I am away.

Keep us always safe

in the palm of your hands.

Watch over all of us

though we live far apart.

With your grace and blessing,

may we see each other in the future:

to enjoy once again each other's company,

to hear and listen to our own life stories,

and to accompany one another

on the road that leads to you.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.

Some More Bakes

2011-01-08T23:19:00.003+08:00

here's a few more attempts i did at baking... ",)

me and my sweet tooth!!!

Happy New Year 2011

2011-01-03T02:37:00.003+08:00

Happy New Year to everyone! All the best for this new year! May we all have inner peace and joy throughout the year... God bless!

Paskong Pinoy

2010-12-29T16:27:00.005+08:00

Christmas was fun for us at the flat. roxanne and the gang cooked the food which was delish! hmm...

after the eating, we exchanged gifts and played the pinoy henyo game and we were super noisy. but, what the heck, all the other flats were a-ruckus as well..

Happy Christmas everyone!

Christmas Party at the Office

2010-12-29T15:24:00.005+08:00

we were told to bring our gifts for our party, and i did. quite frankly, i was really surprised and very happy that everyone joined in, regardless of religion. i mean, i'm saying this because back in the philippines, colleagues who had different religion would back out or just plain refuse to join in on the fun saying they don't celebrate christmas or some other excuse. but here, where most are either muslim or hindu, and just a handful of us are christians, everybody joined in. and i had super fun. it's obvious (in the pictures). ",)

it was simple: we cut the cake and had our exchange of gifts at the office.

and guess what i got?

Belen Ngayong Pasko

2010-12-29T15:06:00.004+08:00

i know i did mention somewhere in this blog that my colleagues have decorated the office real well. the ceiling's all glittery and the doors are adorned with bells, stars, christmas balls etc... it's neat! of them all, i like this nativity scene. to us pinoys, this is fondly called 'belen'. why so, i really do not know. but, it's how i will always call it. belen ng pasko.

Belated Birthday

2010-12-29T14:53:00.005+08:00

'twas the last month of the year when the boss called me in from my checks. i hurriedly went back to the office and found to my surprise that they are giving our birthday gifts to all of us.

whoa!!! my birthday was last february. i started thinking if this was for next year already. but they said it's for this year's... hahaha... some kinda belated ha! well, i was home that time, or should i say, was walking the streets of Ho Chi Minh.

still, i'm grateful...

thank you QCRD!

and of course, here's the birthday cake!

Gift Wrapping

2010-12-21T04:56:00.006+08:00

woke up late yesterday.

slept late the night before as i had to wrap some gifts for our exchange of gifts at the office and here at the flat.

was happy though because i was able to buy some items at duty free for a discount (it's DDF's anniversary sale and airport staff get a 25% off ). imagine me doing the happy dance all the way home. ",)

have bought all my wrapping paraphernalia days in advance so i just went ahead and started wrapping my presents. now i've got some names ticked off my list.

the wrappings though is not as important as the thought that someone remembered you on this joyous season. truthfully, i don't want to be caught up in the fever of frenzy for gift-shopping. but since i had some time these past weeks, i just slowly scoured for bargains really. for me personally, it's not the wrapping but the gift and the gesture of giving even the simplest thing. and it need not be material. a warm hug or greeting, a smile, a handshake, a helping hand - they're a God-send. at times, a quiet gesture can be louder than a shout and can really warm the heart.

1, 2, Go

2010-12-19T04:40:00.004+08:00

i have already finished the first and second steps in procuring the E-ID. finally...

but see, after step no. 1- typing, we were told that within 48 hours, we'd get an SMS for our appointment (2nd step: biometric scanning) in the processing of our emirates ID. but after a week no SMS came. nada! so i called the customer service number they gave for follow-up and still no SMS came. hence, i decided to take matters into my own hands and went for a walk-by (walk-in ito sa linggwahe nating mga pinoy). i waited about an hour before my turn came 'coz they were prioritizing those who had appointments that morning. and then finally it's done.

naku salamat naman, at natapos din. ngayon, ang next step ay maghintay. don't know how long it's gonna be. but i have patience naman. ",)

Chocolate Temptation

2010-12-19T03:47:00.006+08:00

for a while now, i have found myself gravitating towards the chocolate section of supermarkets and stores. i'm such a chocoholic, which is quite obvious with my size now. and i try to justify by saying "down lang ako ngayon. i need a perk-me-up."

not quite ready to give up sweets (oi, bantay abigail, may diabetes predisposition ka!), i've resolved to pursue my baking interest. self-starter na ako ngayon, kaya todo panghahagilap ng recipe ang ginagawa ko, sabay panonood ng video.

here's my first attempt: choco chip cookies!!!!

Simbang Gabi

2010-12-17T23:02:00.009+08:00

attended simbang gabi last night. grabe, sobrang late na kami nakauwi. paano kasi, nag-aya pa ako sa pinsan ko na magpapapicture ako sa may christmas tree. waited until the crowd has somehow thinned bago kami makakuha ng matinong pic. joked with our parish priest while waiting, napadaan kasi siya sa amin habang nag-iikot sa simbahan to talk with the parishioners.

i cannot however complete the 9 night masses, due to my shifting sched. sayang.

the spirit of the season is somehow getting lost on me. lonely yata ang aking pasko ngayon. buti na lang, okay ang atmosphere sa bahay. i can get my moments of peace. at mababait ang mga tao sa house, pinagtitimpihan ako ng aking mga pinsan at flatmates sa aking mga moods.

sana po mabago ko ang ugali ko. mainitin pa rin ang aking ulo at madaling mapikon. lalo na ngayon at may hindi ako type na katrabaho. pabaitin niyo po ako Lord. pahabain niyo pa po ang aking pasensiya. Diyos ko po, di ko na po 'ata kaya.

mukhang madami pa yata akong hihilingin ngayong pasko. but first i have to start the change from within. i should begin with me.

Bertdeyhan na Naman

2010-12-14T22:00:00.007+08:00

we had another birthday celeb here in the house. it was cousin guiller's natal day yesterday. kaya kainan at kantahan to d max na naman. at laklakan pala para sa mga naiwan sa bahay nung gabi. i had to go to work (night shift) kaya kahit hinahabol ako ng tagay on my way out, dedma na lang. at heto ang mga ebidensiya:

my cuz roxy busy in the kitchen...

while cuz rene got busy singing videoke...

singit naman ako ng isang kanta.. na sinundan pa ng isa at isa at isa.... ",)

tim-tim singing with feelings...

and d fudang....

On Eagle's Wings

2010-12-13T05:53:00.008+08:00

Going through the collection of articles that i have kept with me throught the years, once again i came across this one favorite of mine. allow me to share it with you. i think this has been circulated in the email.

Wings of an Eagle

Did you know that an eagle knows when a storm is approaching long before it breaks? The eagle will fly to some high spot and wait for the winds to come. When the storm hits, it sets its wings so that the wind will pick it up and lift it above the storm. While the storm rages below, the eagle is soaring above it.

The eagle does not escape the storm. It simply uses the storm to lift it
higher. It rises on the winds that bring the storm. When the storms of life
come upon us - and all of us will experience them - we can rise above them by setting our minds and our belief toward God. The storms do not have to over come us. We can allow God's power to lift us above them. God enables us to ride the winds of the storm that bring sickness, tragedy, failure and disappointment in our lives. We can soar above the storm. Remember, it is not the burdens of life that weigh us down, it is how we handle them.

The Bible says, "Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles." Isaiah 40:31

Oh dear Lord, be the wind beneath my wings and allow me to soar high.

Sa Paliparan Na Naman

2010-12-10T06:26:00.004+08:00

was pleasantly surprised when i came to work this morning and found the office all glammed up with christmas decors. kudos to the guys who worked at all the stuff: the manger, the ceiling all adorned with stars and glittering christmas balls and santas and gifts, making me feel all christmassy all of a sudden. now i can feel the spirit in the air already. yahoo!

but had to dash to the expo site to check on things there. there's the mid-east biz aviation going on. checked on food and docs and managed to squeeze in some time to walk around the halls to see some exhibits as well.

Standing in Line

2010-12-09T01:30:00.008+08:00

woke up early to hear mass at St. Mary's Church. today is the feast of the Immaculate Conception of Mother Mary. i went for the 6:45am mass so that i can come early for the Emirates ID in nearby Karama. but alas, when i got there at a quarter to eight, the line has been cut for the typing. we were told to come back in the afternoon or else at 7am again the next day.

some went home. but there were a number of us who remained. it's not as if it's so easy to absent yourself from work and request your passport from the office. we have to meet deadlines as well. and to add to that, the E-ID has changed the process. we have to come back again at a set date for the photo, eye scanning and finger printing. waited several hours before my turn came. thankfully i was back home by 2pm. tired and very hungry.

wish it will be easier for the next step.

Holiday Shopping

2010-12-09T01:10:00.005+08:00

i was so pooped yesterday.

just finished my workweek and really looking forward to 2 days off. but since i already had plans for today, i managed to wake up yesterday just in time to do some christmas shopping. went from one mall to another, browsing through SALE items as we had pegged the price for our office exchange of gifts and i wanted to make one good buy ( i think i did, ). also bought a couple of sweaters for my night walks, a few socks (loved the colors!), Liz bag (again), and some items from Woolworths (i got a 50Dhs coupon when i purchased mom's laptop). then, went to Reef Mall for some home items that i've been long wanting to buy. Lifestyle is one good place to shop for gifts. finally stopped at Home Centre and bought a couple of baking pans to get me all set for my baking plans.

i was literally dragging my feet by the time i was coming home at 9pm, both arms laden with shopping bags. i think i may have looked like a christmas tree (as what roommie tikz would call me back in the days). one kabayan who was walking behind me even offered to give me a hand with my loot. ".) but i managed all right.

Feeling Cold

2010-12-06T20:56:00.005+08:00

the air is so cold outside. i was shivering as i was getting out of the office this morning and while walking the short distance to my flat from the metro.

it's a cold, cold december morning.... i sure long for a warm hug to welcome me home.

Goodbye

2010-12-05T16:54:00.009+08:00

Free

to roam around

see the sights

and laugh out loud

Sad

to hear your voice

watch your face

as your tears fall

Dark

are clouds above

awaiting dusk

as night time comes

Dance

swirl me around

as music plays

to calm my nerves

Kiss

me one last time

I bid goodbye

to sweet romance.

♪ Smile - Charlie Chaplin

2010-11-28T21:38:00.001+08:00

charlie chaplin.... classic!

SMILE

Extended Eid Holiday

2010-11-26T07:02:00.008+08:00

yes, we've had our fun at the beach.

but wait, there's more....

seems there was money left over from our department's budget for outing. we really didn't spend much at the beach. and since we were each allocated a certain amount for the outing, it was decided that we go for another outing two days after. so we went for a Desert Safari this time.

bitin nga lang ako. mas mahaba ang dune bashing na na-experience ko before with my bro and cousins. sobrang ang titinis ng boses namin kakasigaw noon. this time, nag-ga-gather pa lang ako ng energy para sumigaw, tapos na ang tripping. ngek, parang wala pa yatang 10 minutes iyong aming dune bash. hindi ganun ka-worth it and binayad naming 175 dirhams each.

here are my pics on the desert safari (selected na lang.. baka kasi ayaw ng mga kasama ko ma-post sila dito) :

and in the gathering twilight, feel na feel ko na ang lamig ng hangin. pumapasok na ang lamig galing europa at russia... mukhang kelangan ko nang paghandaan ang taga-lamig ko (tawag ng friend ko nung college sa allergy ko sa malamig na hangin). you got me scared there, Keys & Fingers. i really need to find out how to cure my allergy.

QD Team Eid Outing

2010-11-22T04:03:00.009+08:00

namamaga na naman ang mukha ko. it's been like this for days now, in fact almost a week already. season's changing. the air's gettin' cold. and that's where i have a problem. coz i've got an allergy to the cold winds. so here i am, with my face in blotches of mini-rashes.

i remember my birthday back in 2006 when i was in singapore with my mom, aunt and sis-in-law. my face went all puffed up. i really felt bad 'bout my look back then. now, i'm kinda getting used to it. i have not been feeling all that well though. so it kinda adds up. really feeling lousy.

but news, news, news. our outing finally happened. on the last day of the Eid Al Adha, celebrated wednesday here, my dept at work went to Fujeirah to have an outing. i really enjoyed being out of dubai for a day. though, i could not say the same for the driver. he must have been so tired. we left the airport at around 8am and got back around 10:30 in the evening.

guess i enjoyed just watching the view on the way while my colleagues were happily singing all the hindi songs that they love. i saw desert on the way and rock mountains. i was wondering really why it wasn't green from afar. when we got nearer, saw then that they were rocky.

we stopped by Friday market for tea, some shopping and of course, pics-taking.

the place we went to was an open beach. very public. i decided to not get into the water anyway. my colleagues enjoyed swimming and playing. but the water is quite salty. i sure miss our beaches back home.

Holiday

2010-11-16T00:28:00.004+08:00

i was alone on the shift this morning. felt quite lonely just thinking of everyone else having a good time during the holidays. well, i can take leave some other days anyway. still, it's just not the same when everyone else will be at work by then.

sure am looking forward to getting my foot out of my lonesome state, this lonely emirate.

Birthdays

2010-11-14T03:51:00.007+08:00

My mom and Kuya celebrate their birthday this month. And both have the traits of any true Scorpion. Parehong pareho and temperament. Feisty, headstrong and passionate.

Mommy will be 60 already. She mentioned when i was home that she wants to retire from work next year so she and dad can just concentrate on the farm. Kuya on the other hand, will be 39. tinutukso ko nga e. malapit na siyang mag-life begins at 40 (which means, ako din pala).

how time flies!

A very Happy Birthday to you both! We love you both so much!

Eid Al Adha

2010-11-14T02:22:00.004+08:00

We have Eid! .. again...

It's the Eid Al Adha here now and all I see are Sale, Sale, Sale banners in the malls and stores. Everyone's celebrating. We got the memo in our office for the 3-day holiday, which officially starts on the 15th and end on 17th November. Looks like I've got additional comp off's to take. Hmmm, maybe next year or the new year, perhaps. Let's just wait and see. But i definitely have to confirm with my colleague if i can still take that one more off for the Ramadan Eid.

Walked down to my Suki shop and bought a new watch and bag. I'll have to postpone some more shopping for next month then.

Eid Mubarak everyone!

Sweet November

2010-11-14T01:32:00.024+08:00

we're going to have an outing... hooray!

for a long while now, we've been taking picnics every 3 months or so. now, the bosses have finally decided to gather our dept's budget allocation for outing and take it this year. whew! we dont have to worry about food and transpo. we're just gonna go there to have fun. sa wakas makakarating na din ako sa ibang emirate. ",)

meantime, here are a few more pics from my last vacation... home sweet home!

Sept 30, Iligan- Ziplining at Ma. Cristina Falls & Nature Park Trip

my bros and mom kept insisting on our going for a ride in the white waters of cabula. so off we went for our family bonding time. the experience (nahulog si langga sa rapids), the fun (and fear), the memories... priceless!

Oct 2, CDO- Water Rafting at Cabula

mom related she wanted to visit a cousin in davao so i insisted to come along so i can meet them too. of course, didn't forget to take pics while we were road-trekking.

Oct 8, Bukidnon-Davao Road Trip - Davao City Tour

and of course, paying homage...

Home for the Fiesta: Diyandi Festival

2010-10-29T05:38:00.008+08:00

it's almost end of october now. walastek! di man lang nakapag-oktoberfest sa pinas....

anyway, nakapag-celebrate naman ako ng fiesta sa amin. Iligan's Diyandi Festival was a week-long celebration in honor of our patron saint, St. Michael the Archangel. although i only got towards the end part of it, the culmination of the festivities through its parade and Kasadya street dancing competition.

stayed for a few days in manila to do a bit of shopping (as my mom sent me on an errand for some early christmas shopping habang wala pang christmas rush). went home on a sunday, the 26th. my package from dubai came the day before. i already sent some stuff for home about 6 weeks before so that i wouldn't be burdened with a lot of stuff in my baggage. so it was really very timely. it was like i brought a big balikbayan box along with me. and i happily opened the package bringing out one surprise after another. though i had like two jumbo bottles of Pantene shampoo that got spilled onto a few blouses i sent, and so had some clothes washed before they get stains all over them.

kuya, chi and langga arrived on tuesday and quickly asked to watch the march in the city streets. sayang, would have loved to get one of those shirts they sell in the Mugna. anyway, here are a few pics from our city fiesta.

and with relatives coming over for the clan's meeting in preparation for the annual clan reunion.. and of course, just for simply hanging around with loved ones.

Bakasyon Muna

2010-10-27T16:52:00.018+08:00

matagal-tagal din akong nawala dito sa blogging world.

sobra akong naapektuhan sa init ng klima dito sa aking sulok ng mundo. even with the toolbox talks we are getting on the job about preventing heat stress/stroke, pakiramdam ko hindi talaga kaya ng katawan ko ang sobrang init. as if it can be helped... eh talaga naman kailangan kong lumabas at mainitan sa airport during my flight inspections.

it even came to the point na nag-n-nosebleed na ako at parang mag-c-crack na ang ulo ko, na para bang hihimatayin na ako. sobra!!!

so i handed my application for leave and was granted a month's vacation which i spent where else but home. it's been a long while since i did nothing but stay home and spend R&R moments with my family. good thing i've reached 18 months at work already so now eligible for that leave. i only took casual leave (about 2 weeks) last feb when i went to vietnam with my family for my bday. this time the resource planning (read, $$$) has not been that difficult since it's a paid vacation (tickets and all). lucky me!

see me here much too happy as we were travelling home from the airport.

will be posting pics of this bakasyonista on my next entries.

Ramadan

2010-08-13T21:22:00.003+08:00

couldn't stick to my diet. tried to go along with the fasting, but that too doesn't seem to work. however am i gonna get back to my previous size?

August Notes

2010-08-10T03:13:00.005+08:00

my dad and bro esmuky's bday always opens this month. dad went home to iligan. the couples in the neighborhood were having a prayer meeting for him when i called home.

esmuky on the other hand was on the gala again with his brods and HS friends.

all my best wishes to two important men in my life. may the good Lord continue to bless you both with a happy, healthy and peaceful life.

malapit na naman ang ramadan. mainit pa rin dito sa work.

At Home on my Off Day

2010-07-14T00:23:00.005+08:00

good it is also my aunt's day-off today. I woke up and decided to go to Carrefour for some light shopping. was able to talk to my aunt and learned she also had the day off and so we went instead to Satwa and did some shopping there.

this is our life here. really looking forward to any rest and quiet time that we can have.

So Hot

2010-07-07T21:40:00.004+08:00

my color's back again.. after being toasted alive in this climate.

and i'm way bigger than ever! can't seem to control my size anymore. i guess it's old age. haaay, the years are slowly beginning to show. and i'm perpetually changing wardrobe... waaa!!! my clothes are getting a tad too tight na.

i hope my friends can still recognize me in this size. it's high time for a drastic diet! hoooh!

Achy Breaky Heart

2010-07-01T00:40:00.005+08:00

broken hearted again...

as Kris A. says, i have come to terms with the fact that relationships are not for me. maybe, i am meant to be single forever. if that is the case, then i'm going to make the most of being a single woman and be the best that i can be being single and enjoy my single-blessedness.

kaya ba nag-splurge na naman ako sa isang liz claiborne bag? haay, what an expensive way to lift my mood , ha?

Heartbeat Mania

2010-06-26T13:38:00.003+08:00

para akong nasa cloud nine.

ang gaan ng feeling!

ang hirap makatulog, sa kaiisip...

bumibilis ang tibok ng puso ko sa tuwing...

.... napapadami ako ng inom ng kape. (lintsak na night shift 'yan o! napipilitan akong magkape!)

June updates

2010-06-20T00:04:00.002+08:00

it's now mid-year and the summer heat is in the air.

it's kinda lonely being so far away from home. i miss my family. i miss my bro kahit siya ay pasaway. i wish time will come when he learns to stand on his own two feet and not be dependent on our parents or me.

this year seems to be exceptionally hot. i've been having constant bouts of headache, fatigue and dehydration. the extreme summer heat and 1.4degC temperature of the chillers at work's just too much. it's taking a toll on my health.

am really thinking about that much-needed vacation now.

How Am I Feeling?

2010-05-31T03:30:00.009+08:00

let me say it with a song...

Refiner's Fire

D A Bm
Purify my heart
Em7 Asus A Asus A
let me be as gold and precious silver
D A Bm
Purify my heart,
Em7 D A
let me be as gold, pure gold

CHORUS:
D G A
Refiner's fire
D G A
My heart's one desire
D A
is to be holy
D G Asus A
set apart for You Lord.
D A
I choose to be holy
D G D A
set apart for you my master,
Em Asus A G D
ready to do your will.

D A Bm
Purify my heart,
Em7 Asus A Asus A
cleanse me from within and make me holy.
D A Bm
Purify my heart,
Em7 D A
cleanse me from my sin, deep within

Credits:
©1990 Mercy / Vineyard Publishing
Words and Music by Brian Doerksen

Desert Adventure

2010-05-18T21:29:00.006+08:00

with nothing better to do, am posting here now pics from last year's (this time around in summer) Desert Safari with bro esmuky, cousin roxy and some friends. hahaha... really long overdue, i know.

More Checks

2010-05-02T19:15:00.003+08:00

too many checks, too many hecks!

what the...!

It's a Cruel World

2010-04-21T11:54:00.004+08:00

'tis a cruel world we live in...

i have all too often wondered if staying in this land of gold is really the right thing to do. i have had nothing but disappointments ever since i arrived. it would have been fine if there was somebody behind me, pushing me to go forward. but the only family i expect to do that is the one person who is breaking my heart to pieces.

I Surrender

2010-04-18T14:08:00.005+08:00

suko na ako!

i feel like such a failure.

Holy Week 2010

2010-04-02T14:39:00.007+08:00

got lucky my off days fell on maundy thursday and holy friday. can stay home and take my much needed rest.

everybody's home exceptin' cousin roxanne who's on duty at hatta where she's doing home care for an elderly lady. aunty also went on duty last night. today's a friday so visits from family is a-plenty. aunty is assigned to a hospital in sharjah; also to a local elderly lady.

Holy Week is Here

2010-03-30T19:32:00.006+08:00

Woke up early to attend Palm Sunday mass at St. Mary's.

At noontime the next day, a colleague at work told me he saw me walking down rigga road and was wondering what i was doing there in the early hours of the morning. so i explained to him that i have just gotten off the bus at al kabayl and walked all the way to our flat passing by his side of town.

enjoyed some food at the cafeteria nowadays. we've been having some wonderful new recipes these days. and they're fish and veggies, too.

Vacation Update

2010-03-14T14:06:00.006+08:00

flew home for a 15-day brief sojourn for my bday. arrived in manila at midnight via ek flight 334. and flew again next evening to HCMC with my mom and kuya's family. 'twas wonderful to have no work to think about for days but just have good fun with family. am starting to feel my age. really shouldn't be working myself to death anymore, but just be settled and staying home. just really want to be domestically focused these days.

flew back to work and settled some domestic flops at the flat.

Planning to go Home

2010-02-03T21:21:00.004+08:00

Am quite excited for several days now. my bday's coming up. not that i'm looking forward to getting older. i'm actually excited about something else. will wait til i can finalize plans and ask my boss for the go signal. please Lord.... ",)

New year, New beginnings...

2010-01-22T20:49:00.004+08:00

ended the year quietly...

thankfully, this year turns out to be promising for my bro. so happy...

missing my family: daddy, mommy, kuya, chi and nicole

Bro Is Coming

2009-12-14T04:17:00.004+08:00

am counting days. esmuky will be back here in dubai in a few days. miss him here.

Eid Mubarak

2009-11-28T01:08:00.002+08:00

Eid Mubarak. It's the Eid Al Adha here.

Airshow

2009-11-19T01:55:00.006+08:00

went to the airshow.... wish esmuky was there with me.

wonderful!!!!!!!!!

After All This Time

2009-11-14T20:05:00.007+08:00

Got home quite late last night. I was hurrying to make it to the early bus but already it has gone by the time i got to the bus stop. Anyway, when the next bus came and i was sitting on the front row there was this lady wearing an EK uniform who came to sit beside me. She was a kabayan.

She called up someone from the US who turned out to be her fiancee. After some time, she chatted with me and i came to know that she is engaged to her boyfriend from 23 years ago. They have both gone their own separate ways and had in fact gotten married but separated. They came to see each othe again thru facebook. imagine that! the romance got rekindled and soon they'll be getting married to each other. She relates it's the most wonderful feeling. because only now did she feel peace with one other soul, this one person who she plans to be with for the rest of her life. And she has prayed to the Lord to give her exactly what she got now.

It's such a wonderful story. And i'm such the hopeless romantic. She asked me to pray for her and their future. I surely will. Annie, i am sure the Lord has granted you your heart's desire. You deserve it.

Undas 2009

2009-11-02T22:39:00.007+08:00

undas na naman...

panahon na para ilibing.... ang kahapon...

i really feel that it's time to move forward. it's time to let go and forget the vestiges of a past long gone. ",)

Burying the Past

2009-11-01T03:20:00.007+08:00

i never thought it would come to this. but i guess, all must come to pass.

i apologize once again for this long post. i just need to let go of some things before i can truly move on. i wrote this way back in the days when life was complicated and it was quite a struggle to find my voice when questioned about life and love.

SMILE FOR ME

I have reason to smile... again.

A good friend of mine invited me to the christening of her latest bundle of joy, Mikaela. I would have gladly said yes, but I felt a bit hesitant. Somehow I knew my "Oo ba." would sound hollow even to my own ears. So I just sent Jing a text message that said "Sure, y not?" so she won't hear the tinge of trepidation that accompanied my response. It isn't that I do not want to be there. It's just that I do not want to see someone who I knew would be there.

It was a moment of mixed emotions for me. After all, it's been more than 3 years since I last saw my ex-boyfriend. I had no idea what he looks like now.. not that it matters anyhow. But one thing was for certain, he will be there with his wife. Yep, he recently married. And for the life of me, I still didn't know how to deal with that situation.

I can still recall that fateful night not too long ago when I learned that there was another woman in his life. The truth was spilled out by no less than a brod who, w/o a care in the world, announced to everyone at the table that it was only a matter of time before he (my ex-boyfriend) will formalize his relationship with a certain lady friend. Apparently he was not aware that A and I were going out again. Shocked, I saw him casting furtive glances in my direction. And so, there I was at the corner of the table with my tears on a free fall. Feeling that I couldn't bear it any longer, I excused myself to go to the washroom.

The two-timing bastard! Oh but, I was never one for a confrontation. And hard as I try, I could not keep my mind on a focus that night. It was the wife of that brod who took me home, saying "Don't worry, Abby. For all you know you're better off without him. Kita naman sa mga kilos niya na hindi pa siya ready mag-commit. Mukhang ayaw pa niya iwanan ang pagkabinata. You, on the other hand, have to move on."

He did not even bother explaining. He avoided me. I waited for him to talk to me, call me or drop by my office to talk about what happened, but he never did. Not even a single text message was exchanged between us. I never saw him again after that. And I was left on my own, thinking: So this is how it would be?

The days tumbled over one another in as bleak as they could be. And I clothed myself with self-pity. I could not believe that the person who I loved and who I treasured so much would just treat me that way. I have often thought about him in between those lonely years and more. I’ve often wondered about what could have been. Yet I knew the world will continue turning and there is the matter of the what is to attend to. Not wanting his memories to haunt my every waking moment, I busied myself with work, work and more work. Then I began to realize I have to start living again. So I decided to pursue my MS degree in Applied Nutrition … of course at part-time pace. I started going out with friends again and became active in my Singles for Christ community.

Jing has always invited me over for special occasions but always I’ve declined. I knew my ex will be there because he is after all the best friend of Jing’s husband. In fact, we used to be a foursome way back in College. Oh the fun we had back then. I hold with me memories to last me a lifetime. What with the late night gimiks, escapades, thesis sampling sessions, the lot… We forged bonds of friendship that grew stronger with each passing year. We saw each other through tough times. We’ve laughed together, shared dreams with each other, hurdled ordeals together. But as with everything, it was time to move on to higher levels of struggle. We continued on life’s path taking different routes. Jing and Marvz married and now have 3 wonderful kids. By some twist of fate, I get my regular dose of news about my ex and his romping. I felt real bad whenever I hear of get-togethers being held without me. Oh how I wanted to still be part of that circle. In the many years that I have known them, I’ve always believed I would grow old with my friends. I still want to see them through life’s crests and troughs and witness how we can best each storm in our lives. But now, another has taken my place. So I…. I stayed away. It was better that way. No friendship will be tested, no bond will be swayed.

The day of the christening came. Another good friend called me to say she’d pick me up somewhere and I could hitch a ride with her. The day turned out bright and sunny. After meeting up, we proceeded to Marvz and Jing’s house. A couple of batchmates in high school arrived and together, we went to the church. I got a feeling of ‘déjà vu’ walking up the steps to the church and all throughout the ceremony as I vividly remember Jing’s first-born’s christening, that of my god-daughter Malynn. Afterwards, we then went to the lunch venue at a nearby resort. Boy, did I tease Jing about it being a ‘bongga’ celebration.

More guests turned up at the resort—more family and more friends. Was I glad I’ve got a few faces that I could associate with names. Well, the day was proceeding quite smoothly, when suddenly, my friend gave me a nudge at the knee. We were sitting at the table nearest the gate and she was directly facing the entrance.

“Abby, dumating na si A at ang wife niya”. Surprised, I couldn’t turn around hastily as it would be very obvious. Then we heard Jing calling out that lunch was ready. Guests started queing up to the buffet table. We waited until most of the guests have been seated and got up for our turn. Then we saw A standing up to get some more food for both him and his wife. He chatted with my friend and I stayed behind. Then I turned and talked with Rico who was lining up behind me.

After the meal and a few laughs at the table with friends, Jing decided to have a couple of munches herself. I went back with her to get more food and also got myself a glass of drink. On our way back, I heard my name being called out by my batchmates at the other table. So I excused myself from Jing to catch up with my old buddies.

As I approached them, Waldo called out to ask, “O Abby kumusta na kayo ng boyfriend mo?” Then he hurriedly whispered, “Iyong guy doon sa kabila ang dating boyfriend ni Abby. Iyong katabi ng buntis.” All eyes turned to the other table. And heads started nodding.. Ahh. I feigned a smile. Boy, was I in hot territory. “Walanghiya ka Waldo! Walanghiya ka talaga!!!” I whispered through clenched teeth. We were hissing like old times. After a few glasses of beer and some more pulutan and chikahan, out came the videoke. Bless the soul who invented videoke. What ever would a party be like without it?!

The boys transferred and were now all hunched up together in the surrounding tables. My friend was going and I would be left behind. Before leaving though, she mumbled about something or somebody not being introduced. And before I knew it, Jing was introducing me to A’s wife. Whew!!! In between my batchmate Mike’s belting out his own rendition of a Sinatra or something… and the goodbyes of Cath and her daughter Kyla, I was beginning to feel the heady effect of the beer. I calmly managed a “Hello.” Then with a smile and a nod, I invited myself to sit at the table where Bing was seated and Jing was munching away. For a brief moment I found myself staring at the lady before me, imagining myself in her place.

And silently I cried .. without tears, without pain, without remorse. All those years of anguish and sleepless nights and shattered dreams came hurtling back. Faces, places and memories fleeted past. And just as suddenly as it came, my mind came to a standstill. Wonder of wonders, I stayed calm. I have always imagined I would look pathetic when this would happen- that I might be bawling or wailing hopelessly. I have always doubted how I will be holding up in the face of such eventuality. But there I was, exchanging a few pleasantries with the person who have what I have always thought I wanted. I realized it was not what I want. And I am happy that I am not fettered with a chain that would bind me to something or someone that I have long given up on. Surely, I deserve more.

Then, before I knew it, guests were starting to leave. Chatting with Ana, wife of my batchmate Zed, I felt a light tap on my shoulder. Turning to the source, I was surprised to see Bing saying they are leaving as she still has an appointment with her doctor. By the way, she is 8 months pregnant and due to give birth on Christmas day. What a blessing indeed! I briefly nodded and smiled, adding “ Sige. Ingat.”

Then I thought: Hey, that’s it? Lord, I didn’t feel any pain. I have steeled myself for whatever possible pain might bury me alive. But none came. As with the passing of the season, I realized I am turning over a new leaf. I am closing a chapter of my life and starting a new one. Leaving behind sad memories, and offering a silent prayer that there will be better days ahead. Only God could have given me the grace to sustain me after so much pain. Amazingly, I felt God smile at me that day. “,)

I basked in the quiet comfort of His love, oddly reassured that my lifetime, like that of others, will be one of pain as well as joy, of tears as well as laughter, of solitude as well as companionship, of giving as well as taking, and a promise of so much more. I glory in His love. With hope and gratitude, I lift everything up to Him who never abandoned me through all the trials I had to face. What else can I offer Him from whom came all that I have, but my heart, my soul and a lifetime of faithfulness.

Eid Mubarak Year 2 in Dubai

2009-09-21T21:07:00.004+08:00

can't believe it's already been a year since i first set foot here in dubai. last year, i was very new to this place. and it was really exciting to finally go to the beach. imagine, going to the beach here in the middle of the desert.

it was holiday for most of our flatmates and so we were all able to go early to the jumeirah beach park. this year, it doesn't seem to be that exciting anymore. and nobody seems to be in the mood to go on an outing anymore. i don't know. maybe, it's the effect of these difficult times. everybody seem to be tightening their belt these days. we just need to understand what everyone's going through. i for one have been really feeling the pinch, too.

1 in Dubai

2009-09-19T16:11:00.002+08:00

it's been a year now since i first set foot in this their so-called land of gold.

i'm still one here in dubai.

Almost 1 Year Now

2009-09-14T03:21:00.005+08:00

wondered how i could have survived this place. don't really know how....

after almost a year, life here in dubai is starting to take shape.

And I Love You So

2009-08-28T04:05:00.005+08:00

there's this Flilipino movie (starring bea alonzo and sam milby)that's being shown in al ghurair. flatmates pia, odess, chuchay and oliver were going and have invited me to watch with them. so off we went. and again, as expected my tears just went on a free fall. couldn't help it. i'm one sensitive gal. and it's a tear-jerker anyway. hehe..

oh well, gotta take time for things as this. ",)

Sad Again Today

2009-08-08T23:39:00.006+08:00

even though i've steeled myself for things like this happening, it's still painful when it does.

Bertdeyhan na Naman

2009-08-02T14:48:00.009+08:00

It's Daddy and Esmuky's bday yesterday.

Wishing you both all the best that life can offer. Love you both guys! Mwah!

July Update

2009-07-26T17:38:00.011+08:00

it's been 4 months since i started work with ekfc.

so many things to discover, so many things to learn.

and most of all, i'm so glad to have wonderful people to work with. would have really wanted to post pics at work but some of them are rather shy about posting their faces to the worldwide web and have advised me not to include them. i've got loads of pics during picnics and games at the park pa naman. sayang. here's just a few..

Satwa Fun

2009-06-30T17:37:00.007+08:00

my eyes have been drooping for hours before i was able to go home. thankfully, it was my shift change. took advantage of the break to go and have fun with family at my aunt's new place. she and cousin debbie have already moved to satwa where it's nearer work and they'd be having more peace when they get home.

roxanne went early to help cook the food and we came after lunch just enough for me to have a quick nap and there i was rejuvenated for another day of karaoke singing, eating and drinking the night away.

goodness, my brother got inebriated and so did cousin loveley, too. reneeirvon drank at his own pace so was able to remain sober until it was time to go home. all in all, we had big fun and aunty was quite happy to see us off.

My Inaanak

2009-05-05T02:13:00.007+08:00

I remember a time when i was asking my mom why i still do not have any inaanak seeing that my housemates have long lists being ticked off during Christmas season. And she answered maybe because my friends are still not married so there's no one to ask me to be ninang yet. Then friend Jing got married and lo, I had my very first inaanak, Malynn! Pagkatapos nito, naku sunod-sunod nang nagsipag-asawa ang mga kaibigan ko. Tama nga naman at may mga trabaho na. Kaya sunodsunod na ding dumami ang aking mga inaanak.

I still can't believe that it's been 12 years since. Ang tanda ko na! Hahaha...

To my inaanak, Malynn! May you grow up to be a wonderful lady and obedient daughter to your mom and dad. And be a good model to your younger brother and sister. You know they look up to you. Stay rooted in your faith and continue to serve the Lord in your own little way. God bless you, sweetie!

Life Here Now

2009-04-30T23:52:00.005+08:00

April's come and about going... soon it'll be May. Back home, April showers will have started to kiss the summer starved earth. But here, the beginnings of summer can already be felt. And i'm really wondering how i'm gonna survive the summer heat now that i've got shifting sched at work. Mid-day shift's gonna be a scorchingly hot walk outside. arggggh!!!!

will be posting some pics of our Desert Safari adventure some other day. still have to get a copy of some pics from my cousin's cam and my brother's phone.

I miss my family and friends terribly. Maybe my work's gonna take much of my time to have to worry about homesickness now. i certainly hope so.

I'm So Excited

2009-03-12T15:48:00.009+08:00

" I'm so excited!
And I just can't hide it..."

i remember these lines of an old song way back in elementary. migosh, baka di pa kayo naipanganak nun, siosy.... hahaha, i'm so old. ",)

but anyway, there's no age limit to getting all fired up and revving for whatever life brings to us. the Lord knows and continues to give us something to keep us moving and raring to go. and i do look forward to whatever each day has to offer. dahil nitong mga nakaraang araw, papalit-palit talaga ang ihip ng hangin. kaya itinataas ko na lang sa Kanya ang lahat dahil Siya naman talaga ang masusunod, kahit gaano ko man nilalabanan ang buhay.

i am grateful for your blessings Lord. they are countless. you continue to humble me and you continue to nudge me deeply. what i have now, all these by your grace, Lord.

Thank You

2009-03-01T14:25:00.002+08:00

i turned 36 yesterday. i've been through 3 sets of the chinese 12-year cycles.

i say thank you to God for everything. Lord, you are and always will be.

thank you to my parents for seeing me through all these years. you've been really, really wonderful.

and to all family and friends for being there.

Renewal or Catastrophe?

2009-02-26T13:29:00.004+08:00

yesterday was ash wednesday. managed to get myself to church right after work for mass at st. mary's. thanks to a kind soul, kabayan dennis, who let me ride with him in the taxi. ang hirap pa naman makakuha ng taxi in our part of deira.

crisis, the father said, can either bring about renewal or catastrophe. it depends on how you react towards the crisis. whether it's a personal crisis, spiritual crisis or economic crisis, its ultimate outcome in your life would be considerably affected by how you handle matters as they come. any kind of crisis is an alarm- an alarm for us to do something with our life or with our outlook on life. sometimes the Lord brings us to a crisis in our life because He wants to bring us closer to Him. else, if we do not change and continue with our old ways, this will lead to a catastrophe because there is no renewal.

during these difficult times, it is always a good thing to hear counsel from the Lord. it may be through dear friends or family or leaders in church or in school. even tiny wisps of wisdom that come to you in unexpected moments.

"create in me a clean heart...."

One More Week

2009-02-22T15:25:00.006+08:00

i've one week more to go before i turn another year older. another year to write on my tabula rasa. another year to learn more and laugh more and face life's challenges. i do not understand why all these have to be. but still, i thank the Lord.

Thank You Lord
I thank You Lord, for the trials that come my way
In that way I can grow each day, As I let You lead
And I thank You Lord for the patience those trials bring
In that process of growing, I can learn to care

Chorus:But it goes against the way I am
To put my human nature down
And let the Spirit take control of all I do
For when those trials come
My human nature shouts the thing to do
And God's soft prompting can be easily ignored.

But I thank You Lord, with each trial I feel inside
That You're there to help lead and guide me away from wrong
For You promised, Lord, that with every testing
That Your way of escaping's easier to bear

Chorus

Yes, I thank You Lord, for the victory that growing brings
In surrender of everything, life is so worthwhile
And I thank You Lord, that when everything's put in place
Out in front I can see Your face
And it's there You belong

yes, i'm thankful. i'm thankful as well that my bro is back here in dubai now.

Faithfulness

2009-02-22T14:46:00.004+08:00

woke up lighthearted; was aiming to atttend the early morning mass with my cousin and aunt but decided instead on the 9am one which actually gave us ample time to relax a bit as we ate our breakfast. we were early in church and able to pick a good seat.

the Gospel was about the healing of the paralytic who was lowered down from the roof by his friends. faith played a big role in this story. it is the faith of his friends that moved Jesus to heal him. when Jesus saw the determination of the friends to get the sick man to Him, overcoming obstacles of the big crowd and making a hole on the roof of the house, He saw that they were clinging to their faith.

i realized that my worries are really trivial compared to the lot of so many people around the world. and to think that these last few days, i've been really feeling down in the dumps. and already, i've lost hope. so much for my faith, huh, or the lack of it is more like it. seems that my niece has more faith in me than i have in myself.

the priest also mentioned that praying for others is one way of moving the Lord because He is easily moved by prayers that are not self-directed but are intended for other people. i now appreciate more fully the Prayers for the Faithful that we pray during mass and to really mean it when we recite the Apotle's Creed (I believe in God....)- truly mean it, believe it and have faith.

as they say, faith can move mountains. and my sis-in-law reminded me that i should continue to dream, hope and have faith. after all, these are free.

The Art of Letting Go

2009-02-19T17:24:00.005+08:00

maybe it is the lesson i have to learn..

being away from home has made me realize the importance of love and support. and i'm getting lots of them now from my family and friends. a number has been chatting me up on the web to wish me birthday greetings and i treasure so much the sharings we've made in just a matter of several minutes. i cling to these words of encouragement like a lifeline during these days when i am starting to feel homesick and depressed.

yes, they are opening my eyes and guiding me on what lessons i need to learn from all that i am going through right now.

and i thought:" Hey, am i really so obtuse? the Lord is testing me to breaking point until i yield myself completely to Him. but i am being very obstinate. sometimes i find it hard to accept that what i want for myself is not at all what the Lord wants for me. a friend said maybe that is the lesson here: You have to learn to let go and move on. but i kept bargaining. and this friend told me: Then stop bargaining with Him. Just ask Him to give you what you deserve.

sometimes however, it crashes my spirit to find that when He answers, it isn't totally what i expected. i feel very humbled in seeing that what i deserve is less than what i have dreamed of. one other friend said that sometimes it's one way of challenging us to move along forward. when there's something to hang on to and look forward to. otherwise, we become complacent with our lot and stop striving.

i don't know. i'm not much of a runner myself. but i guess, i'll stick around to run the race, however rocky the path may be or twisted and crooked. this is quite a journey i am making. and i've got loads more to learn out of life. I just might have to keep on moving along. i realize now, maybe i need to polish on that will of moving on. but first i need to train my heart on the art of letting go.

LOST

2009-02-17T14:04:00.007+08:00

I lost, I’ve lost, I’m lost

Yes, I lost. Just last weekend, I lost a favorite pair of slacks which I left to dry out on the veranda. I can only assume it fell to the lower grounds of the building and I couldn’t find it anymore when I went down to search. Maybe somebody’s gone to pick it up and took it. Maybe it’s found another owner. Maybe. I lost it.

I’ve lost. In my bid to get a good job in a reputable organization, I’ve emailed all my close friends and my family to help me pray that I be chosen. But until now they still hadn’t called back. Maybe the other candidate already got it. Maybe I didn’t pray hard enough. Maybe. I’ve lost hope.

I’m lost. I keep thinking back : Hey, I had it all planned at the start. I went abroad with all great hopes and expectations. But I hadn’t foreseen the economic atmosphere. I hadn’t counted on the crisis looming ahead. I hadn’t prepared myself well for stiff competition. Maybe this is not the place for me. Maybe I am not welcome here. Maybe. I feel lost.

I want to find my place in the sun. More than that, I want to find myself again.

Hearts Day

2009-02-14T16:00:00.007+08:00

It's heart's day and no one will be left at home tonight but me and Ate Mercy. So off we went also to Al Ghurair just to look at what else is there to see. We stopped along Pic n Save route to buy us some shawarma and Pepsi and walked on towards the mall.

There were so many shops on sale as DSF (Dubai Shopping Festival) is due to end tomorrow. Sadly however we both have no money to splurge so we just spent the next hour and a half going inside the shops and ogling the items on sale.

I was also able to talk to Gina, one former flatmate who has now moved to Sharjah because her work is there. Also texted friends and family to greet them happy heart's day.

And so, before the clock strikes this midnight, here's wishing all my readers a Happy Valentine's Day. May your hearts be full of love.

Inspiring Talk

2009-02-13T04:08:00.004+08:00

had a very interesting and inspiring talk with flatmates pia and odess.

i received another call a couple of days ago saying that i should go for 2nd round of interview at the company that i have been appying a job for. i was so glad i got shortlisted. have been praying for such a blessing and has been asking everyone close to me to also pray for me that i'd get the job.

after dinner, spent a few minutes with flatmates pia and her sister odess who gave me beautiful words to ponder on that night.

we were exchanging stories of the setbacks we've been through in life- from our previous work, deciding to go abroad, and experiences upon arriving in dubai. and they shared a few insights into their life and shared with me some words of wisdom especially on receiving graces and the acceptance of God's will.

the interview turned out okay. the quality manager is a very kind lady who is softspoken and very smart. she is also a nutritionist like me. now it's down to just two. i do so hope that i will be chosen.

as i was lying on my bed, i remembered the words of encouragement from my former boss when she emailed me: If it is also God's desire for you, He will make the way or He will send you the right people to help you find your goals.

how i want this to be so.

Valentine's Day is Near

2009-02-09T16:08:00.012+08:00

malamig na naman ang valentine's ko. heto, wala pa ring katuwang sa buhay. =)

i miss all my friends so much. yes, of course, i have my relatives here. but it's different if you are talking to people who share your views and who understand your feelings. people who know exactly where you're coming from; who, borne out of years of being close together and living under the same roof, will automatically say, " I get you. I understand what you're trying to say."

yesterday, i saw new upcoming movies being featured on tv. then i saw a familiar title that was on the bestseller's list some years back. now, i'm feeling all so lonely all of a sudden because i realize i no longer have my friends to watch the movie with. i'm so sure that like in old times, we'd all be laughing so hard and be so noisy inside the movie theater just like when we watched P.S. I Love You last summer.

i'm thinking there's no one that i can invite to watch the movie with since most of the ladies at home are married. i seem to be the only one who's interested enough to watch He's Just Not That Into You. yeah, i know, another chick flick you might say. but what choice do i have here as entertainment? ito lang makakatugon sa kakikayan ko sa ngayon. Haaay....

but anyway, was at last able to go to Global Village. my cousins and i went around looking at what-nots and taking photos of the 'booths' (if you can call them that) of participant countries. the phils has a very big parol so it's quite easy to spot. wish, esmuky was there with us. sadly, he's in Kish, Iran at the moment waiting out the required number of days out of this country before he can re-enter by visit visa again.

posting here some pics...

I've Got Mail

2009-02-04T17:12:00.007+08:00

got mail today. quite unexpected.. i was sure glad to hear from my former boss again. gave her a very long reply. hahaha... but i appreciate so much her words of encouragement to me. let me share a few lines here.

nakakataba ng pusong isiping hanggang ngayon patuloy pa rin akong binibigyan ng Diyos ng mga paalala at pagpaparamdam na hindi siya titigil na bigyan ako ng patnubay sa mga panahong kailangang kailangan ko ito. maraming salamat po!

A Blessed Day

2009-02-01T14:09:00.007+08:00

i felt so blessed yesterday. went to mass in the morning with my aunty brenda. the mass was officiated by the bishop who is celebrating his fifth year serving in the vicariate. and there was a congress of the sisters in the UAE and third, a renewing of vows of sister anne murray, headmistress of st mary's. her renewal vow was so wonderful. i felt so blessed being there witnessing her say her vows. and i felt humbled and blessed.

the mass was so nice, the songs so close to my heart, and the girls dancing during the mass were a delight to watch.

an emptying of my cup, a celebration of faithfulness, a desire to serve the Lord at the presentation feast. truly, the Lord picks the most unexpected day or place to bless us. He continues to fill me with His love and mercy, even though i feel i am not worthy. but still, i couldn't bring myself to empty myself upon Him after all this time. my self will is still pushing against His will, even though i know i am powerless. how then can He fill my life? i'm beginning to feel i'm wandering in this journey.

Counting and Accounting

2009-01-30T18:05:00.003+08:00

naku, nagtatago na naman itong hilaw na puting ito. ayaw kumausap sa mga naniningil sa kanya. ang hirap naman ng buhay ng isang accountant. habulin- as in, habulin ng mga pinagkakautangan niya. heto at kakatawaglang ng isang naniningil sa kanya, pero dedma. ang pinapasagot sa akin ay wala daw siya. mantakin mo iyon! pinaghihirapan mong pagtrabahuhan ang sweldo mo, pero ang gagawin lang ay ang makipag-hide and seek sa iyo pagdating sa singilan at bayaran.

ganun kayang talaga kapag accountant ka? nagtatago ka? ang lam ko, mataas na propesyon ang accountancy. at napakamahal ng pirma ng mga ito. maggaling sila sa pagbabalanse. kaya nilang pagtugma-tugmain ang mga nuemro at makagawa ng monthly accounting kahit anogn gulo ng records. e paano, matinik sa numero e.

speaking of pagbabalanse ng numero, heto end of the month at maloloka na ako. paano, wala na akong mababalanseng numero sa pitaka ko. puro barya-barya na lang nasa bulsa ko. binilang ko nga e, makasasapat para pampamasahe sa bus papasok ng trabaho. buti na lang, barya ang ibinabayad sa bus. ang nakakalungkot pa, ayun, nag-exit ang kapatid ko. kinailangan magpadala ng pangkain at bayad sa tirahan doon sa iran. pinabaonan ko na lang ng madaming de-lata, noodles at mga biskwit para makatipid-tipid naman sa gastusin. paano na kaya ang mga susunod na araw?

Sa Atin-Atin Lang

2009-01-19T15:10:00.007+08:00

it's the 3rd week of the year and here i am clicking away at my keyboard. wala na akong time maggawa sa bahay ngayon. sinosolo ng utol ko ang aking laptop. naku, nawiwiwli sa multiply at ngayon niya lang nadiscover. sabik din siguro makibalita sa mga kaibigan niya at sa aming pamangkin. Nicole has her own multiply site kasi, at nakakatuwa ang kanyang mga poems.

iba talaga dito. lagi arabo ang salitang naririnig ko sa opisina. palibhasa mas komportable silang magsalita sa linggwaheng kinagisnan nila. kahit magkakaiba sila ng nationality, mga arabo naman sila kaya ito ang common sa kanilang lahat na wika.

hanggang ngayon, kahit magli-limang buwan na ako dito, naninibago pa rin ako sa mga mukha ng mga ito pag nagdadatingan sila. kungsabagay, nagkakakumpol-kumpol lang sila dito pag andito si amo galing saudi. nakupo, napaka-busy bigla dito sa opisina pag nagkataon.

nakaka-OP nga lang kasi di ko sila maintindihan. pakiramdam ko nga, hindi kaya sinasadya nilang magsalita sa arabo para di sila maintindihan ng mga banyaga? parang tayo din kapag nagkasama-sama sa isang lugar at may mga pinag-uusapang ayaw marinig ng ibang lahi, automatic ang pagsasalita natin sa sariling wika.

parang dito sa blog ko. pag may gusto akong isulat na wala akong pakialam kung di naiintindihan ng iba, dire-diretso ang pagsusulat ko sa wikang atin. ito naman ay... sa atin-atin lang.

Bertdey Pipol in d House

2009-01-13T15:17:00.005+08:00

There's a lot of flatmates celebrating their birthday this month. There's Aunty Brenda, Ate Leslie, Dunhill, Chuchay and Roxanne. That's five of them. 5 birthday celebrants = 5 celebrations = 5 occasions to gorge on food.

It's mainly the reason for my not being able to go down to my previous size again. I am so enjoying all the eating!

2009 na

2009-01-08T19:01:00.005+08:00

bagong taon, panibagong hamon...

it's been 4 months since i first set foot in dubai- this land of gold.

to me, i saw it as a land of opportunity. like so many of my kababayans, i have finally given in to the dire need of pag-asenso sa buhay.

But this chapter in my life's journey is just getting started.

Little had I known that all those little travails that I've taken during my childhood and all through my growing up will have shaped me into what I am now.

I bear the scars of all the wounds I've sustained growing up, both physically and emotionally. Each scar is a living memory of the adventures I've had as a child. Each scar is associated to a place, or a face or a happening. And I can say I have so many happy memories growing up. Happy with a lot of adventures and a lot of falls and kneescrapes along the way.

These days, I am at it again. Taking part in the game of life- taking risks, falling, picking myself up, enduring the scrapes, nursing the wounds, holding on. I feel blessed to have family and friends to support and encourage me every time I feel down. And I am grateful I have the Lord to carry me through all of these falls. It's another year to spend in pursuit of my dreams. Another year to journey on.

The Year That Was

2008-12-31T17:11:00.010+08:00

2008 has been a very eventful year for me.

A lot has happened. A lot of decisions have been made. There's been quite a number of changes happening all at once.

Deciding to leave a very comfortable life back home and venture into the unknown has been the biggest risk I took in my life. But I had to do it. It's in one of my TO DO LIST before I turn 40. Oh well, it is a fact. Undeniably, I am not getting any younger. I had to do it now while I still can rather than wonder for the rest of my life about the what could have been's.

Along with the decision to leave my work and my country was the thought that I may not have the same kind of life that I have been used to back home. So I have to prepare myself for such eventuality. And I may not get the same kind of job, or the same pay. So many things are so uncertain, what with the global crisis and all. But just the same, I decided to take a chance. I thought: It's a good thing I have relatives whom I will be staying with. It'll at least make the transition a little bit easier. And they have indeed helped me out anyway they can - financially, emotionally, spiritually. They are there making me laugh, accompanying me on walks, in going to church, and just bringing me along for gala. And best of all, they lend me money when I'm short on cash (which happens pretty often these days, believe me).

It's so comforting to have people to run to. Beyond the physical hardship, emotional strain of separation and psychological worries of what tomorrow may bring, there's only so much that one can take. Sometimes, my body wants to give up because my heart just couldn't take things in anymore. That's why it is really so important that not only the body and mind be ready, the human spirit should also be prepared.

Every choice we make in life is coupled with consequences. I am learning to live with this lesson everyday. Sometimes, we make good choices with good consequences. At other times, we make bad choices wherefore we learn to deal with the consequences and do our very best to try to find ways to make them better.

Eversince I arrived here in DXB, I have been trying to adjust to a very different world. I have learned to condition myself to be more thrifty and more practical with the things that I buy or pay for. I have to constantly remind myself to exercise caution with my finances. For surely, times are hard. But by the grace of God and the help of family and friends, this journey hopefully will only serve to strengthen this human spirit.